Imagine if Steven Bradbury didn’t win that gold medal. The Aussie speed skater knew he wasn’t fast enough to beat the four other finalists but his tactic of cruising well behind the leaders and hoping they fell over worked a treat. Gold medal! National Hero! Footy game played in his honour!
But what would have happened if those other four competitors stayed on their feet (or skates) and the guy finished a distant last? We reckon two things:
- That the name Steven Bradbury will be remembered alongside that of Eddie “The Eagle” Edwards and Eric The Eel Moussambani;
- All three of those guys would just be thankful they don’t play for Melbourne!
Harsh? Maybe…but the Demons copped another beating yesterday and the new coach has a massive task ahead of him to salvage his side’s season…this after just two games! And you thought the four years between Olympics was a long, long time…try being a Melbourne supporter this season.
Just in case you were trying to find a spare $125 million yesterday and missed all the action, here’s what happened at the footy:
- The Dockers lose at home to Hawthorn and Mark Harvey appears to have a few stragglers in his side.
- The Crows haven’t beat the Eagles for a while but did it in style yesterday…and John Worsfold isn’t happy. Between this guy and Mark Harvey, the build-up to the Western Derby will be more tense than usual!
- St Kilda gave Carlton a bit of a head-start before getting serious and winning easy. Nick Riewoldt apparently stayed clear of all tunnels and the Gehrig beard is here to stay!
- Midnight Oil used their performance at the opening ceremony to highlight the issue of reconciliation. They will reform for a once-off so the Swans can say ‘sorry’ for putting us all to sleep last Saturday night. Paul Roos is not amused…
- Port Adelaide will also use the performance to apologise to its supporter base for the biggest losing grand final effort in football history.
- Actually, while Peter Garret and co. are at it, they should say ‘sorry’ from the groundskeepers for the hardness of the centre square. Yeah, a cricket pitch is probably not the best place for a ruck contest…
THE ‘QANTAS’ MATCH
Telstra Dome, Melbourne – 2:10pm (local): Geelong v Essendon (SEVEN)
The history of Australian aviation will be the focus of the Geelong v Essendon match at the Dome. Attempts to allow a series of old fighter planes to fly through the open roof and land on the surface have been scrapped because the roof will probably be closed…just in case it rains at any stage over the next five days.
- Of course, Essendon have a long association with aviation – there’s Essendon airport, the nickname ‘Bombers’ and former coach Kevin Sheedy’s obsession with flying saucers!
And there is Geelong who…well, Avalon airport is not far from there…
- When a football club is performing well, they are known to be ‘flying’. Geelong did this all of last year while Essendon unveiled a new-look playing style last week. Both clubs may be ‘flying’ right now but after this afternoon, who will have crash-landed?
THE ‘EUREKA’ MATCH
MCG, Melbourne – 4:40pm (local): Richmond v North Melbourne (FOX)
Australia You Bloody Beauty round finishes off with the marquee match of the weekend, designed to recognise the importance of the workers in the building of this nation.
- The Tigers, minus their wee-errant skipper, are preparing to put in a spirited performance today and know that victory will give them two wins to start the season…remember, they won just three games last year!
North Melbourne are the footballing epitome of hard work – what, with that Shinboner Spirit thing they have going on – but the fight to survive in the AFL is far from over. Merger anyone?
- The Roos thought they had struck gold when that trade-Wayne scenario landed them Daniel Wells. Now they are not so sure…will he find inspiration from Shannon Noll and lift today?