Tag Archives: Adrian Anderson

Ablett or Bartel? How About Neither? (Media Street)

Sorry mate, wasn’t listening! What were you saying again?

Pfffft! It sounded like you said I’ve just won the Brownlow…that’s pretty funny!!

Oh, I did just win the Brownlow…frickin’ sweet!!!

Brownlow babes, botched vote counting, burger rings and a bloody happy Bulldog! That summed up last night’s Brownlow Medal count which was won by…somebody who doesn’t play for Geelong. Adam Cooney of the Western Bulldogs was rewarded for a fine season by squeezing past Brisbane’s Simon Black to win the 2008 Brownlow Medal by one vote. Cooney hit the lead with one round remaining and then endured an agonising final round of votes as, one by one, his closest rivals were left disappointed as they failed to poll in round 22.

Ablett falls just short again…and yes, Jimmy Bartel, it’s all your fault!

Of course, the evening started with that traditional display of football brutes and beauties, the Red Carpet special…which is meant to be all about what the girls look like in their frocks. However, Channel Ten’s focus was more on finding out who everybody was wearing rather than actually showing the whole dress. The cameras barely panned lower than boob level, meaning that you rarely caught a meaningful glimpse of any of the dresses. Not that we are complaining…

Oi! What are you lookin’ at? Eyes off the merchandise!

Ooops…sorry, Grammy! Anyway, once the medal count kicked off, AFL supremo Andrew Demetriou appeared determined to set a cracking pace as he powered through the early votes. Perhaps he wanted the medal count to end on the same day as it started, or maybe he needed to get home by 11:30pm in order to flick on Channel Seven and watch 30 Rock (awesome show, just won an Emmy…and Channel Seven play it around midnight? Idiots!) But by jumping straight into the round two votes, skipping the opening round entirely, the D threw the entire room into temporary chaos…and hysterics! Very entertaining…totally unintentional, of course, but great viewing!

Getting ahead of yourself, Andy D? Everybody know that you take footy one week at a time…even Adrian Anderson is laughing at you!

Once Channel Ten figured out how to get the count back on track, the votes started flying for the likes of Black, Cooney and Matthew Richardson – who appeared to be the people’s favourite judging by the screams of ‘Richo’ every time he chalked up votes. Bookies favourite Gary Ablett remained within striking distance while last year’s winner Jimmy Bartel twiddled his thumbs waiting for some love from the umpires.

Robert Harvey has now walked through more guards of honour than he has played VFL/AFL seasons!

After yet another tribute to retiring St Kilda great Robert Harvey, and some other puff-pieces, the countdown to the final rounds began and it was here that things got really interesting. Black’s early lead was slowly eroded away as Ablett, Cooney and Richo each made up ground before a best-on-ground effort in round 21 from the young Bulldog put him into the lead. That is where he stayed and it was champagne, speeches and that classic burger/engagement ring story.

Cooney was as shocked as those people who placed good money on a few Geelong players when he won the medal. It was clear that he didn’t have a speech prepared but, like the D’s vote counting stuff-up, it was refreshing to see something off-the-cuff and totally unplanned. Bulldogs coach Rodney Eade, who Cooney actually forgot to thank, believes that the Brownlow win will not change Cooney at all…we hope that he is right!

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Ka-Ching!!! (The Lost Weekend)

Will the League fine the Eagles for this? Hey, it’s the AFL…of course they bloody will!

Indigenous Round will now be remembered as the round the new interchange rule went completely mad! Implementing a new system for processing the interchange of players mid season was certain to cause some controversy and, sure enough, it happened. Just not how we thought it would

Saturday night saw the first ever interchange free kick awarded to Adelaide against the West Coast, which resulted in a goal to Crows ruckman Ivan Maric. Problem is…the interchange stewards made a blunder and that free kick should not have been awarded! John Worsfold is understandably pissy about it and wants to know whether he can get that goal back. Well, you never know – the League seem to be a charitable bunch…

But Adrian Anderson can’t be happy…not only did he fail to raise enough money for his end-of-year Pimps and Hoes party but he will have to front the media this week and give one of his boring-ass legalese explanations why all his decisions are awesome. Can’t wait for that…

We want the goal back (clap, clap, clap, clap, clap) We want the goal back…

So before Mr Anderson shits us all to tears with the defence of his interchange rule, here’s a wrap of all the events of AFL End-Of Year Fundraiser Round:

SUNDAY

Can you feel the hate, Jeff?

Thanks for the honourable loss today boys…it’s probably fitting.

The only time you will see Brad Johnson without a smile…

  • Brad Johnson had another fairytale script written for him as he lined up for the match-winning goal after the siren and keep his Doggies unbeaten. But he missed and the Roos prevail. Obviously, Jonno’s script must have been edited by whoever was responsible for writing Monster House…because it all went to shit! But Brent Harvey must have be a fan of Monster House…because he loved it!

SATURDAY

If I am so good then why is my team so crappy???


Please, no need to clap…it was just Essendon…

Fellas, I don’t mean to sound harsh…but you are by far the shittiest team I’ve ever coached!

Round Nine – AFL End-Of-Year Party Fundraiser

This weekend is meant to be all about this…

But instead, it will be all about this!

This is supposed to be Indigenous Round – a weekend dedicated to recognise the contribution of indigenous players to our great game, the highlight being Dreamtime At The ‘G on Saturday night. But wait just a minute…it seems that the League has an even better idea that will benefit all football followers. Ah, no – actually it will just benefit those people at AFL House…

Here’s the story. A few weeks ago, the Sydney Swans had one too many players on the ground at a vital stage of the drawn match against North Melbourne. Well, the League didn’t really know what to do. So they looked busy for a few days and then slapped the Swans with a fine…one half was suspended but Adrian Anderson used the other half to throw a sweet toga party!

But the League couldn’t afford to have this blunder happen again and Mr. Anderson hadn’t tinkered with anything for a while so they put him to work on a new player interchange system. They introduced it last week and it was heavily criticised by the clubs…mostly because they didn’t know what they were doing and it was panic stations on the sidelines.

Don’t Panic! The AFL have introduced new interchange stewards…

Typically, the League thought that was totally awesome! So much so, they are actually going to start punishing clubs for botched interchanges as of tonight. And if the Swans are one of those teams, they will get slugged an extra 25 grand!

This has made Adrian Anderson about as popular as Brendan Nelson in the football world right now but that’s why he has the job…in which case, he was an inspired choice. But the team at AFL House must love him, especially when he is raking in the dough from club fines and holding kick-ass dress-up parties!

So, now this weekend will be known as AFL End-Of-Year Party Fundraiser Round! How much money will he raise this weekend? And, most importantly, what theme will he choose for the dress-up party? Our money is on Pimps and Hoes…

Adrian Anderson has already picked out his costume…

TEAM NEWS

TIPS FOR THE AFL END-OF-YEAR PARTY FUNDRAISER

CATS by 30: Remember the last time these two teams played? Well, this game won’t be like that at all!

BLUES by 19: Well, they are playing Fremantle…

POWER by 4: Mark Williams is about to lose his mind right now so a loss at home could prove fatal…

TIGERS by 49: Richmond are the most improved side yet cannot seem to actually win a game…expect that to change this weekend.

EAGLES by 15: West Coast are pretty much out of the finals race already but will still win the odd game at home…like this one.

LIONS by 35: Brisbane should win and then we will get another series of ‘What’s wrong with St Kilda?’ articles to read next week. Can’t wait…

HAWKS by 51: The Demons faithful will gather as Melbourne send off David Neitz…but it sure won’t be in style!

DOGS by 26: The Dogs are probably due for a loss but we want them and Hawthorn to stay unbeaten before they clash next week…

Tonight’s action:

MCG, Melbourne – 7:40pm (local): Collingwood v Geelong (SEVEN)

Party At Adrian Anderson’s House! (Media Street)

Hey, we just made 50 grand…party at AFL House! TOGA! TOGA! TOGA!

The 19th man saga from last Sunday’s North Melbourne-Sydney match came to a predictable end yesterday when the League slugged Sydney with a fifty-thousand dollar fine. While the Swans only have to pay half of that amount ($25,000 has been suspended), they keep the two competition points from the drawn result. But that loss of money will sting…they probably need it to pay for covering their home ground in foam!

The Kangaroos, who acted like they were cool with everything before the verdict, were understandably uncool afterwards but there is no hope of them being awarded all four competition points now. Obviously, all hell will break loose again in late August if they miss out on a finals spot by two measly points!

But this scandal now opens the way for the player interchange system to be further investigatedwhich will thrill Adrian Anderson no end. Plus, they now have twenty-five grand of Sydney’s money to spend on a sweet dress-up party!!!

In non-toga footy news: