Tag Archives: AFL Tribunal

Out In Straight Sets? Can We Play Best Of Three? (Septocemia – 2009 AFL Finals Series)



Is Aker taking to centre court for the final time? Will he be back next year? Will it be as a Bulldog? Will we ever hear the end of it?

Two premiership contenders who fell short in the qualifying final and now fight for survival with the prospect of being beaten twice and ousted from the finals. Two lower-ranked teams who each displayed different types of awesomeness to win last week and challenge for a preliminary final place.

This happens every year come second week of the finals…as does Half Back Flanker recycling the same old ‘straight sets’ joke and that image of Aker with his tennis racquet. But hey, it’s September – no time for experimentation! Just go with what you know…

For the Western Bulldogs and Collingwood, this weekend’s semi-finals are all about keeping your composure and displaying the kind of fight that help earn the double chance in the first place. But each face a different challenge. The Dogs have a brave but slightly wounded Brisbane outfit that are intent on piling the pressure on their more fancied rival. They say that they won’t fall for it…we’ll see.

The Pies, on the other hand, are facing what appears to be a rampant footballing machine from South Australia and are having a few personnel issues of their own. While some absences will be difficult to cover, others might be a blessing in disguise. And with the Crows surging to favouritism, can the Pies keep their focus and play again next Saturday night?

If Collingwood do bow out at the semi-final stage, they will join Carlton captain Chris Judd on the sidelines after he was ousted in straight sets. Of course, Judd challenged the two-match ban he received for…whatever it was he was trying to do to Michael Rischitelle’s face. That challenge was thrown out on Tuesday night but Carlton used their double chance and went to appeal. Funnily enough, that also failed and Judd misses the first three rounds of 2010! With all that time off, perhaps he can work his way through the entire back catalogue of Steven Seagal movies

But first, tonight…


Second Semi FinalMCG, 7:45pm (local): Western Bulldogs v Brisbane (SEVEN)


Look out Lions…Brad Johnson has revenge on his mind for Brisbane and ‘The Beer Wench’!

The Western Bulldogs should be favoured to qualify for the prelim in this one but they certainly need to lift. The senior guys need to show up…well, show up and perform, and the versatile Robert and/or Bob Murphy needs to play as he is the best writer/performer/footballer in their team.

But, most importantly, they need to start well! Um, yep…coulda guessed that starting well was part of the plan. And, bugger me, their opponents might have cottoned on to the same idea!! How did the Lions find out about this? Must be a spy in the ranks…


Ok, Jared…you sorted out Josh Carr back in July but failed to get Aker in August. September, big stage, this could be your last chance…go for it!!

Yes, they might be the least attractive of the remaining teams but recent history shows that you cannot count them out  so easily. They also have a stronger look about them with a couple of handy inclusions and Jono Brown’s by-hook-or-by-crook attitude that might spur his boys on. However, I can’t see it being enough to beat the Dogs.

DOGS by 35


All Eyes On The Juddster! (Media Street)


Visy ambassador Chris Judd reacts badly to Michael Rischitelli’s confession that he doesn’t recycle…

Two weeks ago, it was Buddy. Last week, it was Lloydy. This week…Chris Judd? For an alleged eye gouge? Not THE Chris Judd, surely! This can’t be true…must be a case of mistaken identity. Fev is the cause of all problems at the Blues, isn’t he? Must have been Fev! Or even that dancing guy of the same name that married Jennifer Lopez in 2001!

No, it’s true. Carlton captain Chris Judd has been busted for inexplicibly fiddling with the face of Brisbane Lion Michael Rischitelli during Saturday night’s elimination final! The Ruddster will be shattered…

Mr Judd will miss the first three rounds of 2010 unless he takes the early plea, reducing it down to two matches. But relax, football fans – not only is Judd eligible to win the Brownlow Medal this year and next, he can still attend football’s night of nights with his glamorous partner Rebecca Twigley. Forget the AFL tribunal…imagine the trouble he would have been in at home if they weren’t allowed to go!


No Brownlow Medal night? Juddy would be lucky to escape with a bloody nose if that ever happened…

Interesting to see whether the Blues challenge this decision as it appears the Match Review Panel have not left much room for them to move. The incident was listed as a ‘misconduct offence in that he made unreasonable and unnecessary contact to the face’ and assessed as intentional conduct (three points), low impact (one point) and high contact (two points). With those parameters in mind, no doubt it was intentional and the face certainly falls in the ‘high’ category. Unless they can downgrade ‘low’ impact to ‘barely any’, I can’t see how Judd can beat this one.


That’s enough Chris…No need to say any more…Ok, you need to stop…Just shut up now…GOD, MAN – WHAT ARE YOU SAYING?! STOP TALKING ALREADY!!!

What certainly works against him are comments made the day after the gut-wrenching loss to the Lions where he denied eye gouging Rischitelli. For reasons that cannot be explained, except for an early start on Mad Monday festivities, the normally measured Judd revealed he was aiming for some type of martial arts style pressure point on the guy’s face! Yeah, that helped clear things up.

Whether he was fair dinkum or not, it was probably the dumbest thing I’ve heard this year. And now we have knob-ends like Craig Hutchison chasing martial arts experts for comment and floating theories about how it could have been lethal. Nice work!


When the going gets tough, Judd’s super tough…with a Hong Kong Phooey chop!

Something else that would work against any potential challenge is that incident back in 2007 where then-Eagle Judd was initially charged with eye gouging Campbell Brown in a match down in Tasmania. After some ‘generous’ evidence from Brown, Judd walked free. The Hawk hard man appeared to abide by the strict rules of the ‘player code’ on this occasion, though it certainly doesn’t apply in any incident involving Matthew Lloyd.


Here is Chris Judd doing ‘nothing’ to Campbell Brown’s eye in 2007.

Maybe Judd threatened Brown with some pressure point action…or did he use the Jedi mind trick?


If Judd gets off this charge, we will know that the Force is with him!

Round Three – Should Have Laid Off The Choccy Eggs!


Heath Shaw – seems like a touch…a touch too much!

Talk about having a crappy Easter break! Collingwood’s Heath Shaw would have been feeling sick to his stomach all weekend without the aid of a single chocolate egg (or many of them in succession, like the rest of us!) after his report for touching an umpire last Thursday night. Unfortunate because it was actually Alan Didak who touched the umpire, Shaw was just covering up for him…again!


Now this is the best way to touch an umpire…gently, respectfully and with a smile!

The matter has been sent straight to the tribunal so it will be a pretty big night there…particularly if there are a few players who elect to contest charges stemming from round three. But while some people in footy might have had a crappy Easter weekend; Heath Shaw, John Worsfold and Terry Wallace immediately spring to mind; it pales into insignificance compared to the anguish that the family and friends of ex-Hawk and footy documentary whiz Rob Dickson must be feeling. How sad…knocks the stuffing out of you, doesn’t it!

The Games:


Busted nose for Steve Johnson…guess he won’t be able to rely on his looks anymore!

Geelong continue on their merry way as they steamroll Collingwood…causing the normally-obtuse Mick Malthouse to deal in the bleeding obvious. The Pies were made to pay for numerous acts of inaccuracy…which makes you wonder whether Heath Shaw meant to grab the ump’s arm or was actually trying to grab him elsewhere and just plain missed! Bloody skill errors…


Be it celebrating with teammates or wrestling with opponents, Kossie just can’t stop whacking blokes in the head!

St Kilda could hardly have been more impressive during the opening three rounds, and Nick Riewoldt has yet to really get going. So maybe this is (finally) the year of the Saint? The Eagles looked very average and you can just imagine John Worsfold being so pissed that he would have confiscated every Easter egg from his players on the long flight home to Perth!


Two weeks ago, Essendon were a crap team and everybody at Windy Hill hated Hayden Skipworth…seems neither of those things are correct.

Carlton’s rise to premiership glory stalls after the Bombers win a classic in front of seventy thousand at the ‘G. If only Fev wasn’t injured, and if only Matthew Lloyd was really finished as a footballer (like he was last year), the result could have been so different. But…it wasn’t! And a big thanks to the bogan footy family who interrupted a quiet Saturday night dinner at the local Chinese restaurant in Warrnambool with random screams of “Go Bombers”. Made my night!

The Sydney Swans were meant to be Brisbane’s bogey side…sure didn’t look like it! The Lions knock off Sydney at home and it seems like the message of Voss is getting through…though if they are really setting themselves for a return to the big time, beating Collingwood at home is a must. And a Friday night as well…rare territory for Brisbane.


Doesn’t look like Dean Bailey is loving life as Melbourne coach but…



First we had Lloydy, now Warren Tredrea rises from the Useless AFL Player grave to kick six goals as Port bounce back after a poor showing in Perth last week. But come on – they were playing the Demons at home…as if they weren’t going to romp it in! The only problem they were going to have was with discipline…and yes, they struggled in that area again. The coach will be delighted. No, seriously – he will think it’s unreal! He loves tough guys…

The premiership hangover theory can be discarded too as Hawthorn put injury woes and tragedy aside to win easily over North Melbourne. It ended a miserable week for the Roos, Dean Laidley referring to the scrutiny around the chicken sex video as akin to World War III.  Well, without the global significance, the devastation and the mass killings of soldiers and innocent people, of course! Apart from that, yeah – just like a war…

The Crows did manage to handle their week of scrutiny a little better than the Roos, fighting their way to a good road win against the Dockers. Three rounds in and how many wins do Fremantle have? None! Luckily, coach Mark Harvey has a supporter in the coach that just knocked off his team. Grant Thomas is definitely not a supporter…but that probably works in Harvey’s favour!


Will the Tigers find inspiration from Richo snorting his glove through his nose and out his mouth? Well, anything is worth a shot for Richmond…

The Western Bulldogs, a top-four team in good form, had a good win yesterday over Richmond, not a top-four team and not in good form. So the outrage and hysteria about the Tigers seems a little over the top and, dare we say it, contrived by media types who need content for the week. But if Terry Wallace is feeling heat now, imagine what he will cop if they fall to the winless Demons this Sunday!

No More Solly…For Now (Media Street)

Mark Harvey would never get rid of Solly…he loves the bloke! Just look at them – they are like a pair of slightly vacuous twins!

It is season over for Freo’s Dean Solomon after the AFL tribunal handed down an eight week suspension last night for his nasty clash with Geelong Mayor Cameron Ling. The sentence is not only greater than that handed down to Barry Brainfade earlier this year but it’s actually the heaviest handed down by the tribunal since Carlton’s Greg Williams shoved an umpire in round one 1997.

With Solomon out of contract as season’s end, there was talk that his career could be over but there is no way he won’t be back at Fremantle in 2009. The guy is only 28 years old, a premiership defender and, most importantly for the Dockers, a former Essendon player. So Mark Harvey will ensure Solly sticks around – along with Mark Johnson, Kepler Bradley…heck, don’t be surprised if Harvs recruits Jason Johnson and Damien Peverill to join them!

In fact, the Dockers were reportedly seeking legal advice over the severity of the penalty…perhaps they will argue that continuing to play every week alongside Jeff Farmer, Josh Carr and friends is a far greater punishment? They are probably right…

The Solly case ends a frantic couple of days for the League’s match review panel:

In other news:

Big Wins, Big Injuries, Big Problems! (The Lost Weekend)

Solomon sees red…

Well, that was another incident packed weekend! Important wins by St Kilda, Richmond, Collingwood and Hawthorn helped boost their respective finals chances while injuries to key players will test the playing stocks of both Geelong and Adelaide. Well…maybe only Adelaide! But the biggest story from the weekend comes out of Geelong where the Cats and Dockers are still counting the cost of a wild encounter at Skilled Stadium on Saturday.

Yeah, nah…sorry…and that…

Fremantle took a highly physical approach to the challenge of playing the reigning champs with the antagonising pair of Ryan Crowley and Josh Carr unsettling a few Cats…leaving them quite unimpressed. While they came close to crossing the line a few times, Dean Solomon took a few mammoth steps over that line when he attacked Cameron Ling with his pointy elbow!

Ling will probably miss the next month of footy and while Solomon went live-to-air after the match to apologise for the incident, he won’t receive a lot of sympathy this week from the AFL tribunal. How he got out of the Geelong region unscathed is close to miraculous. Then again, has Solomon been sighted since his TV apology? If not, we fear for his safety!

Oooh, that looks nasty! Dean Solomon came out and apologised for that as well…

At least Lingy will be back out there and scaring young children later this season…but Brett Burton won’t! His left knee collapsed during Adelaide’s loss to Collingwood and his season is over. While it is most likely that Burton will be back at some stage of 2009, have we seen the best of the high flying Birdman? Or will he undergo the same radical knee surgery as Nick Malceski and introduce the bionic leap to AFL football?

Here’s a look back at who claimed all the points as part of the Eight Point Game round:


A bit like Tadhg’s shoulder, the Swans just keep popping out every now and then…

It was at this point that the Dogs had the match all wrapped up…

Daniel Kerr might miss a few more games for this little incident


Brownlow Medal punters shat themselves when they saw Gazza’s ankle!

Shoulder trouble or huge Star Trek fan?

David Hille…Luke Darcy wants your phone number!

Hey Crabman!

No Suit For You…Come Back, One Year! (Media Street)

No point getting measured up for a suit to wear on Brownlow night, Buddy…you ain’t going!

To the disappointment of hundreds of prospective Brownlow dates, Lance Franklin won’t be receiving an invite to football’s night of nights this year. Buddy will be staying home on Brownlow night after the match review panel handed him a reprimand on his rough conduct charge. Just like Adam Goodes last week, he can still play this weekend…though it is too early to label Buddy as a protected species…just like Adam Goodes!

But by accepting the reprimand, he is ineligible to win the League’s best and fairest award and, having had such an eye-catching season to date, he would have been a contender. Buddy will just have to be content with a possible Coleman Medal, 100 goal season, All-Australian selection and Grand Final appearance. So we don’t think he will be too worried…

Besides, he is probably surrounded by glamorous ladies everywhere he goes…so every night is a kind of Brownlow night for him! But how much would Alastair Clarkson have freaked out if his Hawks were in the big one and Buddy won the Brownlow on the Monday of Grand Final week! Clarko would probably try to lock him up in a dark room until lunchtime Saturday…

Franklin now joins a rapidly growing list of top AFL players that wil not be in attendance on Brownlow Medal night…one that now also includes Travis Cloke, who was suspended for nailing Carlton’s Michael Jamison with an elbow last Sunday. Notice the complete lack of media interest…that’s quite unfair. Surely Brownlow night needs at least one Cloke in attendance! Come on Cameron…it’s all up to you now!

Travis Cloke won’t be at the Brownlow either…sorry, ladies!

Media street:

Big Day For Buddy (The Lost Weekend)

Bye Bye Brownlow?

While each of the top-four teams passed significant tests over the weekend during Pass Or Fail round, the fate of one of the competition’s brightest stars will be on the agenda today as we await the findings of the match review panel on Lance Franklin’s rough contact report.

It will be interesting to see how this incident will be classified…Jono Brown thinks that the level of impact should be graded as ‘fly’! But with a number of high contact incidents in recent weeks, many people will attempt to make comparisons to the findings of other cases, including that of Adam Goodes…who still played on the weekend but was found guilty and is now ineligible for the Brownlow.

While a suspension would end Franklin’s Brownlow medal hopes, he is still comfortably leading the Coleman Medal race…and the ladies will still love him! But if he does miss one week, another huge game in front of goal from Carlton’s Brendan Fevola could make the goal kicking race very interesting! Fev kicked a bag of eight in yesterday’s big win by the Blues and could close the gap even more if Buddy is sidelined….particularly as the Blues face a leaky Essendon on Sunday!

Fev stated that midfielders make full forwards look good after the win yesterday…but will he remember this come contract time?

What a day for Carlton! They kicked fourteen goals in the second half to blitz a blockbuster-fatigued Collingwood and storm into the eight. Now the Blues are talking finals, the fans are going mental and old Jack Elliot is hanging around the joint again…pretending like he still has some influence in what goes on down there.

So, could Carlton really challenge for a finals spot? On yesterday’s evidence, it doesn’t seem that crazy…the only one who is kidding themselves is old Jack!

Here’s a wrap of all the events of Pass Or Fail Round:



Port may have played a physical game yesterday but the umps obviously think they are soft if Steve Johnson was reported for THAT!

If new prez Jim Stynes was crying before he found out the size of Melbourne’s debt, imagine what he’s doing now!



Put that racquet away, Aker…Australia already has a blond-haired tennis bogan that we all love to hate!

Matthew Pavlich and Chris Tarrant share a special cuddle…

Something great must have happened at Hawthorn…Clarko is smiling!

Brett Kirks busts out some Buddhist chants to keep Barry Hall nice and relaxed so he didn’t belt anyone in his comeback game.