Tag Archives: Olympic Games

Round 20 – Trespassers Will Be Prosecuted!

The League are being a little heavy handed about these ground invasions…

Back from a week of thawing out in the far north of the country, Half Back Flanker couldn’t wait to get back into the daily grind of the AFL in footy-mad Melbourne. But while the pasty-white complexion of our skin might have changed (only slightly) during the break, the League’s determination to suck everything that is spontaneous and fun about our game remains the same!

With Lance Franklin and Brendan Fevola within reach of kicking 100 goals for the season, the League have threatened fans with evictions and fines if they attempt the traditional flooding onto the ground to celebrate the milestone. And while some coaches may agree with the League’s disapproval of the practice, including one particular sacked coach who feels it cost him a premiership and elevation into the legend status that currently exists in his own mind (and nowhere else…), the fans are more likely to ignore the warnings and charge onto the field as goal number one hundred sails through the big sticks!

Will Buddy Franklin kick the nine goals required to bring up his century of goals this weekend? And if he does, will security be escorting pesky fans out of the ground and issuing them with fines? Will Kevin Sheedy really be the first person running out into the middle…and will Mike Sheahan be in hot pursuit to whack him over the head with a rolled-up newspaper and shoo him away? All will be revealed during Trespassers Will Be Prosecuted round!

Half Back Flanker actually had the opportunity to participate in a ground invasion way back in 2001 when Matthew Lloyd cracked the ton in the first week of the finals against Richmond. However, despite all the excitement of witnessing such an achievement and the reaction of the crowd, we couldn’t bring ourselves to take that leap over the fence and be a part of it. Probably just as well, we were seated on level two…


AAMI Stadium, Adelaide – 7:40pm (local): Port Adelaide v Collingwood (SEVEN)

PIES by 31: Collingwood are certainties now that Mick Malthouse is milking last week’s mess to fire up his boys again…and they wonder why the media targets them and opposition fans are sick of them!


Telstra Dome, Melbourne – 2:10pm (local): Essendon v Adelaide (FOX)

BOMBERS by 6: Well, Adelaide have never beaten Essendon in Melbourne…why start now? Plus, the Bombers will be inspired to do it for Lloydy

MCG, Melbourne – 2:10pm (local): Melbourne v West Coast (TEN)

DEMONS by 18: The media will probably pay more attention to this match than any other this round. Why? Because it smells tanky! We say – wake us up when it’s over…


GABBA, Brisbane – 7:10pm (local): Brisbane v Western Bulldogs (FOX)

DOGS by 9: The Bulldogs must be getting serious if training is any indication…shame the bust-up didn’t involve the out-of-form Jason Akermanis!

Telstra Stadium, Sydney – 7:10pm (local): Sydney v Geelong (TEN)

CATS by 25: The Swans can add as many premiership stars as they like but they will all be saying one word after feeling the might of the Cats…and that word rhymes with ‘a Canuck in the ruck’!


MCG, Melbourne – 1:10pm (local): Richmond v Hawthorn (FOX)

HAWKS by 48: Terry Wallace says he is ready to face scrutiny on his coaching future at Richmond if they fail to make the finals…just as well because the scrutiny will officially start around 4pm on Sunday!

Telstra Dome, Melbourne – 2:10pm (local): Carlton v North Melbourne (SEVEN)

ROOS by 14: Dean Laidley will be feeling even more confident about a new contract after his side knocks off Carlton and they find themselves in fourth spot!

Subiaco, Perth – 2:40pm (local): Fremantle v St Kilda (FOX)

DOCKERS by 21: Mark Harvey hopes that the deeds of our Olympic athletes will inspire them to victory…even if it means his players don’t get a lot of sleep. Um, does Harvey know that the Games are in China this year? And that the time difference between Beijing and Fremantle is…absolutely nothing?


Footy Fever In The Far North (The Lost Weekend)

Yep…everybody’s talking footy up here!

Well, Half Back Flanker tried valiantly to make it all the way to Beijing last week but it seems that buying tickets for the Olympics off the internet is fraught with danger. So instead of China, we found ourselves in Cairns! But we managed to enjoy all of the greatness of the Olympic Games in the warm conditions of Far North Queensland and with zero smog!

We also managed to enjoy a taste of round 19 action in the AFL…though the examples were far from inspiring. Only twice were we able to switch the TV to the footy; the first time was early Saturday morning for a replay of the Geelong v Melbourne game and the Dees were about to score their first point…the Cats were 61!!! The second time was a similar story (ie. sad…very sad) when the Tigers were being thumped by Adelaide at half time.

Given the choice of hanging at the beach or watching crap games of football, it was no contest. But Half Back Flanker will be back in unsunny Melbourne later this week to find out what the hell has been going on in the AFL! But for now,a quick glance at the other results from Hello China round:

Round 19 – Hello China!

The world’s best athletes have gathered in Beijing to compete…in this? Good luck!

The League’s 150th year celebrations are meant to be at the forefront of our minds this weekend but this whole Olympic Games thingy in China might take the gloss of that! So, with apologies to Tom Willis, this weekend has become Hello China round! And you can count on the head honchos of our great game to really promote this significant milestone on Friday night when Geelong and Melbourne kick things off, right?. Um, actually no – you can’t!

Well, if it’s good enough for the biggest names in the AFL to abandon the local game at the expense of the goings-on in China, then it’s good enough for Half Back Flanker! We will be taking some time away from the daily grind of Aussie Rules over the next week as the quest for Aussie Gold heats up. In fact, we plan to make it all the way to Beijing especially for the event – we just bought some tickets off the internet and everything…how cool is that!

So, here is a quick preview of round 19 in the AFL where every match will play a big part in shaping the final ladder…yep, even games featuring Melbourne and the West Coast! See you next week…


MCG, Melbourne – 7:05pm (local): Melbourne v Geelong (SEVEN)

CATS by 88: Geelong will be guaranteed the minor premiership after beating up on the Demons…this could be more entertaining than the opening ceremony!


Telstra Dome, Melbourne – 2:10pm (local): Carlton v Port Adelaide (FOX)

BLUES by 8: Carlton are playing well and have plenty of team spirit…provided that the players aren’t squabbling over who to trade away in order to get Daniel Kerr to the club!

Aurora Stadium, Launceston – 2:10pm (local): Hawthorn v Brisbane (TEN)

HAWKS by 18: Buddy’s quest for 100 goals continues and he is free to run in as sideways as he wants! What a relief…


SCG, Sydney – 7:10pm (local): Sydney v Fremantle (FOX)

SWANS by 18: Sydney will take another step to securing a double chance but the focus will remain on Barry Hall…whether he smacks somebody or not!

MCG, Melbourne – 7:10pm (local): Collingwood v St Kilda (TEN)

SAINTS by 8: Collingwood haven’t even started planning for this match yet…they’ve been a little preoccupied!


Telstra Dome, Melbourne – 1:10pm (local): North Melbourne v Western Bulldogs (FOX)

ROOS by 18: The Doggies might be more focused on playing the Hawks in the first week of finals than beating North…and we usually get screwed over tipping against the Kangas!

AAMI Stadium, Adelaide – 2:40pm (local): Adelaide v Richmond (SEVEN)

CROWS by 38: Adelaide fancy themselves for the top four so should do the job here and keep Richmond on track for ninth spot.

Subiaco, Perth – 2:40pm (local): West Coast v Essendon (FOX)

BOMBERS by 8: Essendon are still highly unlikely to squeeze into eighth spot but a win here would keep the delusion dream alive for another week!

The Power Of Eight! (The Lost Weekend)

Eight was definitely Buddy’s magic number on Friday night…though it could have been higher had he kicked straight.

Tears, tension and no spontaneous choral singing…that was the outcome of So Long, Farewell, Auf Wiedersehen, Goodbye round! But another theme became apparent during round eighteen and that revolved around the number eight. Lance Franklin kicked things off when he nailed eight goals on Friday night to help sink Collingwood, leaving the Pies in danger of missing out on the top eight. Which might hamper their chances of winning it all, don’t you think?

This was quickly followed by Essendon skipper Matthew Lloyd, matching Buddy’s haul with eight goals of his own and a contender dead-set certainty for mark of the year! The win gives the rebuilding Bombers eight wins for the year and a slim chance of making the eight…though a percentage that is still in the eighties won’t help their cause…

LLOYD!!! The magic power of eight drove the Essendon captain to great heights!

The Saints were pretty much down all day against Port but won by eight – lucky! The Pies only kicked eight goals against Hawthorn – great! Cult hero and personal favourite Damien Peverill may have the good fortune of extending his eight-year stint in the AFL – fine with us! What is with the number eight?

Well, ‘eight’ is considered to be the most fortuitous of all numbers in Chinese culture; as it sounds similar to the word which means “prosper” or “wealth”. And with the Beijing Olympics starting this Friday, August 8th (08.08.08 ), it might spark a series of fortuitous events in the AFL next weekend. Though Melbourne actually play Geelong on that Friday night to open round 19…ah, a upset win to the Demons might be too much to ask for the mystical powers of number eight!


Hmmm…tasty! The Cats rub Richmond’s nose in it…

Hello kitty! Looks like the Roos might be regretting that move away from the Gold Coast after all…

Ever seen a porpoise sleeping? Jason Porplyzia down for the count after a chance meeting with Carlton’s Steven Browne…


Having been banned from performing the handstand, Aker has found a new post-game celebration…a nice little ass-grab!

Gutsy effort from Luke Ball…surely that can’t be good for you!

Well, there’s no doubt that those kids are his…farewell Shaun McManus!